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SPOTLIGHT ON: FAT
Fat Men! I’ve Had it Up to My Fat Thighs With Us!
By Greg
Fat Men! But Holy Shit, just who do we think we are, wedging our selves in at the buffet to drink gravy and break wind out of our fat rolls. Sad! Wretched! Satanic! We lay in our custom built tiled room, full of fridges and floor drains, and the Eastern Europeans we smuggled in pour GALLONS of high protein frothy poo frappe down the blobby, mottled pink Sand Worm holes we had carved by Mexican plastic surgeons. So we can eat more of that goddamn nougat we lust over. We are fat fucks. And I am sorry about that.
And being married to us is no fucking bit of leprechaun spunk, is it gals? No! Manning the bucking nougat ducts to launch more empty calories into us is thirsty work but we drank all the yogurt shakes already, leaving you with tap water. You’re the ones that rub the unguents into our chafed hips, scoop out the lint from between our folds with teaspoons and alternate between holding the bucket and mopping our the sweat off the fat pad that hangs over our eyes while we pass yet another a stone . And you clap like a nursery school teacher when the hard gristle ploinks on the bottom of the bucket and we grunt like beasts.
"More fucking NOUGAT. Please?"
Fat men are for shit. I’m sorry.
You know what I hate about we fat men the most? Our big fat thumbs. And our clammy ass cheeks, clammy from our ass vein being clotted up with more of fatty fat.
And all we do is leave greasy star-fish shaped stains all over everything while we paw for more goddamn nougat. The divan. The Marcello Spundeno leather sofa. Track the star-fishes and you’ll find us tits down in a hypoglycemic coma in a puddle of spittle, piss and nougat, kitchen door ripped off its hinges and the cupboards asunder like a bear raped them.
So, sorry. I hate we. I totally understand if you do to.
I work with a man who has an enormous fleshy ass.
By Greg
Let qualify that; I work with a man who, while wearing pants, appears to have an enormous fleshy ass. And I’m certainly no Adonis, but this man’s ass is so incredibly big that talking about it simply couldn’t be considered cruel. It’d be like scanning across the sweep of the Swiss Alps and being circumspect about the Matterhorn. His ass is empirically, fantastically large and blubbery.
I have not seen this man’s bare ass. Although, given the opportunity I would, because it appear so very fleshy and enormous. To miss an opportunity to seeing his two massive buttocks nude would be like turning down an audience with the Pope.
It even jiggles a little bit. It’s like he’s smuggling two pot roasts on top of a normal sized masculine ass. Is there cellulite? If he flexes his buttocks, do they dimple like two halves of a golf ball? I’d approach him, but I need my job. Maybe if it were my last day, I’d approach him with a crisp hundred dollar bill and ask. Purely non-sexual. I just really want to see his enormous fleshy ass in action.
He wears dungerees and khakis, which he fills out in the seat like twenty pounds of wet corn meal. He’s sort of pitched forward and walks with a slight waddle. Understandably, perhaps. I’ve never spoken with him, but he joshes and slaps backs with the other fellas like a baseball coach.
His upper body seems to be normal, if a little chunky and foreshortened, like it’s being swallowed by his ass.
Yet his legs seem to be both fat and long. Their length may be an illusion, as his fleshy ass is so enormous that it forces him to wear his pants extremely high on his doughy haunches. I’m pretty sure their fatness is not an illusion. Pretty much a wysiwyg type of thing going down. They look like fucking gelatinous tree trunks because that is what they are. Two gelatinous tree trunks holding up twenty-odd pounds of wet cornmeal.
Now, I couldn’t say his ass is feminine. The female buttock form is weighted more towards the bottom and I say amen to that. The feminine badonkadonk is one of life’s great pleasures. No, this is a leather necked, he-man MASCULINE form of Steatopygia. While a little bit hippy, he doesn’t have an hour glass form. He just has a enormous, fleshy ass.
And I'm fascinated by it.
Have a nice day.
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