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A Cultural History of Crotchkicking

Bolgia 11: Demand Better Consuimerism

Media Life: Fuck, Marry or Kill

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Dave Vs. Dr. Phil

Confessions of Fat Nude Man Eating Cookie Dough

Killing Joke: Tales from the Digital Underground

Wednesday’s at 9pm

By Karen Woodward

I need to vent about Television scheduling issues.

Whose bright idea was it to schedule Lost and Veronica Mars at the same time? Those are two of my favorite shows and I’m a nerd who still doesn’t have Tivo.  No sir, I have a cable box, and you know what that means? That means I can’t watch one thing and tape another at the same time. Remember the good ol’ days of the VCR? When we could record one thing and watch another? What the hell happened?

So I have to catch Veronica in UPN’s version of the WB’s easy view. Thank god for Sunday afternoons. Which I’m not complaining about, but it sucks that I have to wait 3 ½ days to see my show! Woe is me.

But, I’m starting to re-think things.  Is Lost really as good this season as it was last?  I’m feeling sort of bored because it takes so damn long for something to happen.  Here are some of my humble suggestions.

 1. I miss the Jack-Kate-Sawyer triangle. Lets put them all in the same place again.

2. Although Sawyer doesn’t even look all that good this season. Can we do something with his hair?

3. Kill Shannon. She has nothing to do now that Boone gone.  There is something just weird and forced about her relationship with Sayid. Like “oh shit we had to fire Ian Somerhalder and now we have to give Shannon a storyline.”  But this totally ruins our affection for Sayid, because isn’t his whole life based around his love for that woman in his backstory?  It just doesn’t make sense. Kill Shannon.

4. Claire and her baby – remember them? I know that Emilie DeRavin is the only cast member who doesn’t live in Hawaii, and it’s probably expensive to fly her out. And I’m sure it’s expensive to have an infant on set. (Although that doll looks pretty real.)  But I can’t get invested in a character that I never see. Besides, I love Charlie (Dominic Monahan) and with Claire gone we don’t see as much of him.

5. Please provide answers about something. All the questions are making my head hurt and I’m not sure how much longer I’m going to care.

Veronica Mars, on the other hand, has some good solid storytelling. It actually appears that the writers thought things through. Pieces fit – arcs, people and clues that are introduced actually come back. But that’s not to say that I don’t have a few complaints:

  • I totally do not understand where Veronica and Logan’s relationship went. They broke up in about 15 seconds. No tension, no fighting, just all of a sudden, Veronica telling him that she didn’t like his “toadies” and “someone was going to killed” (to which he rightly replied “Someone already has.”  Hello Veronica, remember your best friend Lilly? And that dude on the bridge?)
  • And are we supposed to want Veronica to be with Logan or Duncan?  Because Duncan is a D-O-R-K Dork. Although, I suppose I could understand why a girl would want to lose her virginity to him. Very safe. But Logan on the other hand, that line “If the best part was the cuddling, he wasn’t doing it right”???  You got me at hello!  V, that’s your guy. Despite the nasally voice, and self-conscious mannerisms, he’s still a lot sexier.
  • Duncan is an emancipated minor and living in the Neptune Grande, because his parents “went to Napa for the duration.” Yeah, it’s that easy. More like, “My dad left my mom and married the first female president of the United States over on ABC.”
     
  • I like Wallace. And I love Erica Gimpel (his mom). But this storyline is boring.  Son’s Real Dad Comes Back. Snoooooooze. And Jackie (Tessa Thompson ) is so clearly a bitch – why can’t Wallace see that?  Does he want to get laid that badly
     
  • I’m assuming that the issue of the guy Logan perhaps killed will come up again. I hope so, because I’m curious. But I feel pretty confident that it will, because I know that I can depend on Veronica Mars.

And I’m crossing my fingers that I can depend on UPN. Because if they stop showing re-runs on Sunday, I’m gonna have to make a choice Wednesdays at 9pm.

 

 

 

 

UPDATE: ICE ON MANHATTAN!
BLOG AVP: SHOCKER!
Rachel Wacholder and Elaine Youngs go splitsville

Prep yourself for this weekend’s Coney Island OPEN!

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DOUG WEEKE