Written by Jeff Stuckey
Please welcome new crackpot Jeff Stuckey. He's a fiction writer who knows what it's like to be loaded on an empty BART train. Visit his his my space.. great writing and killer tunes.
So I sit here with my drink, my pills and my general misunderstanding of the world. Girls as always seem to confuse and make me dizzy. For what would seems like such a simple creature they have the power to stop time and make or break your day.
They can make you say no to band practice.
They can also make you board a plane for Thailand inside of 20 minutes of talking to them.
Why is this?
I have done ridiculous things for girls...I dropped out of school when Lynette Dillion got thrown out. (I was gonna leave anyways) but you know what I mean.
When we got arrested for rioting in SF I got released first and met a girl long of limb and hair also charged with rioting, so fuck my friends…I’m going to her house for pizza, beer and of course sex.
The rest of you fuckers can spare change for BART on your own. And I ask you what kind of friend does that?
The world does it's best to tell us that
SEx.,seX.-sEx is something to be taken and taken at face value. I don't think so. It still seems like a private explosion to me. A miracle every time it happens. All the baggage that comes with it is one of the best parts.
Yes I just wrote that.
It’s like opening a package you found in plain view but hadn't actually looked at. Inside is a bunch of crap you didn't order...but then you see something cool and before you know it your flying around the house playing with it in as many places as possible. All the other crap you first saw now starts to make sense. You even begin to dig most of the crap.
Like the way she hates soda out of a can but will die without her 2 litter of root beer.
How happy it makes her if you rent some gay ass musical just for her.
You know what I mean.
Girls...I still believe their all nuts but god damn!
They can make you feel like everything that's important in your life is leading up to that point when they smile at you on a cloudy day.
How do they do that?
the middle east, god and angels, quantum physics, cancer and the rainforest eco-system...these are all easier problems to answer than understanding the hearts of girls in any place that you might be.
I say drink a little a lot, remember to put the toilet seat down, keep in mind that they are a different species and to be cherished as such and always, and I mean always kiss them when you get confused. Kiss them and hold those parts that drive you wild right up against you.....
Then kiss, kiss and kiss some more
you get the idea...